Trust and Love: How They Are Connected
I wish to discuss two words: Trust and Love. Both seem appropriate in light of recent unfortunate events. Here are two questions for you to consider. Trust is given or earned? And second, is love given or won? And since I have two questions, I must confess a third. What is the connection between Trust and Love?
Once we have answered the first question, we can say that it serves as the pinion of love, the foundation, the rock on which love is built. And there is no question, that is what the world needs now.
So what does it mean to trust? To love? The matter goes back to the beginning of time. In Christianity, the first Adam trusted Eve. He had no reason not to trust her. Sampson had no reason not to onlyfans free trial
trust Delilah. Caesar, although he was warned to be careful of the Ides of March, had no reason to distrust Brutus. Each found their trust betrayed. What happens when trust is betrayed? Love files out the window.
To love, one must trust that the other will promote his well-being and happiness. It violates trust and love is lost, perhaps never to return. If he does, he may not be on the same safe base as before. How do you get it back? Earn it? Yes! You have to make periodic installments just as you would in your bank account. And then maybe when the account has been active for a while, the confidence will return. If you do, it will be in the name of love. It is trust that engenders harmony and peace; it is trust that engenders that love that every human being seeks.
Dr. Robert Frey reminds us that we must do everything possible to create a reality based on love. In doing so, we must realize that it is a ‘moment to moment matter’. So how do you love? First, let’s see if we can come up with a functional definition. I love chocolate, Sailors, mystery novels. I love my pet. Love Love Love. And not an ounce of understanding. The word Love has been so used that it has become almost empty. So how do we take something that has almost lost its meaning and put it back? This question is not really different from the question about trust.
Confidence is given. Love is given .. Is trust given with conditions? Only if it has been raped. Is it necessary to read the fine print to know if you are trustworthy? Aren’t that prenuptial agreements or pre-assigned responsibilities within a relationship, fine print conditions?
The musical muses tell us that ‘love is a thing of many splendors’. We are told that ‘love is what makes the world go round’ and we are told that ‘love is the greatest’. However, don’t we all put restrictions on its natural flow? Don’t we have reservations because love is an unconditional commitment? After all, isn’t conditional love something that can be turned on and off? A conditional love requires that one partner do something that pleases the other. At the simplest level, a child picks up his toy from the ground because his mother says, “How sweet. I love you, honey.” The message conveyed by such behavior is that one must earn love. People who are perfectionists and people-pleasers have probably experienced love conditionally and have never really felt it. They have not experienced that unconditional commitment. What box!
Dare I ask for a commitment to what? To the faith that love will be returned? In Christianity, it is remembered that “faith that moves mountains” is worthless without love. We are told that even philanthropy without love is devoid of spirituality. In Love, we give to others. That is the essence of philanthropy; it is the essence of faith and should be the basis of our mutual interaction. When one loves, there has been a choice, an express wish made for the happiness of another person. We call that benevolence. The commitment then, is with a personal behavior that reflects benevolence.